Category: Random thoughts
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How I’m Getting By: Life As A Freelance Writer
My name is Tseliso Monaheng. I pawn words and pimp phrases for a living.
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#Unreview | Matwetwe: Promotional Ideas
Matwetwe. Ace shit. Hyper-relatable. Anchored by a front-porch trio steeped tongue-deep in Spitori’s inventive linguistic twists, featuring a hood genius and his bathroom rapper and business mogul-aspirant friend, who mix in and out of the lives of a rolling cast of kasi residents. Their motive? Push trees. The strain? Matwetwe.
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#Satire | “It was a missed opportunity” – #MenAreTrash Denialist
“I mean, we could’ve changed the game mate, innit,” says a distressed Thembalamagumsha Khuzwayo a day after the world-renowned hashtag, which has been attributed to Twitter User @kwamsunu_000, was included in the latest edition of the Oxford English dictionary.
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#Satire | Man Loses Plot, Arrests Another For Being At The Wrong Place, At The Wrong Time
People who’ve no frigging clue how these innercity Jozi streets operate act all forms of shook when their outsider asses encounter even the slightest of discomforts. Such was the case with Herman Mashaba when he decided to take a stroll and catch a vibe in the Summer heat. The Johannesburg mayor, creator of Black Like […]
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#Satire | Literatti Gone Rogue
Prissy book lovers and their frivolous publishers got the shock of their lives when news emerged that this year’s entries for the K. Sello Duiker Memorial Award were not up to standard.
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#Review | Quincy Jones & The Bull$hiiitte
Right at the end, an interviewer asks the decorated artist a question: What have you not been successful at? Marriage, answers the artist. Laughter ensues.
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100 Greatest Kwaito Songs From The 90s And Early 00s
Around March, I was asked by Apple Music to compile a set of 9 playlists, each containing 100 songs, across different genres. The series is called Mzansi Essentials 100, and consists of black music ranging from Kwela to Jazz to Mbaqanga, Maskandi, to House and Hip Hop.
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#CurrentlyReading | Ta Ramps’ Current Novel
Ta Lesego Rampolokeng’s latest novel is a tongue-in-cheek experiment in the number of ways the reader’s psyche can be assaulted by writing made great not only by the writer’s ability to thread sentences together, but their investment in the subjects broached, too.
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This Ship Is Built On Blood…
This is Craftmen’s Ship, the latest addition to the Maboneng Precinct’s innercity expansion project. It’s currently under development; a project due for completion in under a month. Two years ago, the land on which this building now sits was occupied by a couple of Tanzanian homies who manufactured furniture and fixed vehicles. One day, a […]
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To Be An Unknown Writer Of Little Significance…
It means that you won’t get first preference for anything. It means that publicists won’t reach out to you when the clients they represent have an offering. It means that you’ll always be questioned — by video directors on set; by PR people who can’t tell the difference between good and bad reportage; by everyone, […]